The Growing Up Years

This is a special song if only for the fact that its arrangement consists of just Simon (sorry, Landis) and his semi-acoustic guitar. It's also a thoughtful rumination on adolescence.

George Carlin said that he resented being told to "Have a nice day." It put pressure on him, he fumed: "Now I've got to go out and somehow manage to have a good time!"

Our speaker feels the same sort of pressure to go find a party or something. "People all say, 'Laugh and be gay!/ Youth is the time for fun and pleasure.'" The adults around him wish to live vicariously through his winsome exploits, no doubt. But his mind is on more serious (ahem) matters.

Then another adult, one in more immediate authority, tells him to only focus other serious matters. "Dad tells me we can't go steady." His father tells him to limit his attention to schoolwork... and not to get too involved too young: "Don't try your wings before you're ready."

Faced with this intractable fate, our speaker does resigns himself, and breaks up with his girlfriend. "Now you and I must say goodbye/ There's nothing else we can do."

However, there is still a longing-- "How can I ever live without you?"-- and with it comes a resistance to his father's ironclad rule.

After all, time is on his side. While "long are the growing-up years," on the one hand, they will eventually result in his... actually growing up. And "strong is the ache in my heart." This convinces him to play the long game, and consider the break-up a temporary status, one to be reconciled once he reaches adulthood. "...when we're grown, you'll be my own," he vows, "Never, no never to part."

Now, we adults know that this is unlikely. Yes, there are cases in which high-school sweethearts wed. But in general, once college keeps two young adults in separate time zones for four years, such passions cool. Since they can't be with the one they love, as the CSN song goes, they love the one they're with.

"Youth is wasted on the young," sighed Shaw, sounding like one of the adults in the song urging teens to sow their wild oats. But this teen doesn't even have time for that. He's making some very grown-up commitments that he can't even keep because of his schooling.

It's a shame that his father can't see that his goal-- preparing his son for adult life-- is being done in a limited way. Yes, part of being an adult is getting a degree, finding a job, and making a living.

But another major part is making a life! The relationship he's being deprived of would mature him in other, equally important ways.

Chances are good that his serious young man will seriously pursue the young woman he is so serious about, once he gets the freedom to do so. This might be one of the times high-school sweethearts weather the storms of college and do end up together.

For now, maybe he should have his dad talk to his mom. She'd set the old man straight.


Next Song: I Can Feel It Happening to Me

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That Forever Kind of Love

Even thought this Johnny Cash-like number mentions grooms and brides, it will never be used as a wedding dance. How do we know? Its first lines are: "All of my friends who've gotten wed/ Seem to wish that they were dead." And, as they saying goes, it's all downhill from there.

"I'll lead a bachelor's life instead/ Unless I find/ That forever kind/ of love."

Divorce rates rose sharply in the late 1940s, then settled back down... but never to the almost-nil figures they had been. Still, the stigma on divorce-- societal, religious, etc.-- was still in force, and many unhappy marriages persisted.

"Take a happy bride and groom/ Look at them-- it's love in bloom," just like most of the pop songs of the day insisted it could, would... and should.

"But later, watch their dream go 'boom,'" Simon, as Landis, laments. "They didn't find/ That forever kind/ of love." [emphasis mine]

The chorus paints their average day: "He buries himself the paper/ She complains and nags and wails." For those of us who don't remember, "the paper" is what we called the newspaper, which was printed on actual paper and delivered stories of yesterday's events to our homes. So the more he ignores her, the more upset she gets, and the cycle escalates (it's a three-dimensional cycle, OK? Just... go read your paper.)

Our speaker is almost thoroughly disenchanted. After all, he has been sold in marital perfection since he was tucked in by Mother Goose and entertained by Walt Disney: "It seems like happy endings/ Are only in fairy tales."

Well, almost disenchanted. He still holds out hope that the "forever kind of love" exists, and that it will happen to him-- "I wouldn't mind/ That forever kind of love"-- and that the glow of early love will last: "Married and yet so starry-eyed... Forever groom and forever bride."

While there are many songs about wanting, finding, and getting love, there are far fewer about keeping it. And this one is about not keeping it. Again, yes, there are dozens of break-up songs, but the idea is that once you are married to the love of your life, you're finally done with all of that "Wishin', hopin', thinkin' and prayin'" and "tossin' and urnin'" that define the dating process.

But the speaker finds that even marriage is no guarantee of happiness and contentment! He surveys his married friends, and finds they have a whole new set of traumas and dramas to deal with.

"Why do fools fall in love?" then, as another song asks, answers itself. Why? Because they're fools! And "why must I be a teenager in love?" is also self-explained by the idea that we never stop being "teenagers" when it comes to love-- love make us teenagers all over again.

Our speaker is almost mature enough. He'll wait for the kind of love worth waiting for-- love with another person who wants to maintain that sense of wedding-day bliss. But soon after the wedding day-- actually, as soon as the ceremony is over-- we stop calling the couple "groom and bride" and pronounce them "husband and wife."

While it is wonderful to try to maintain that wedding-day bliss, it must also be understood that it is impossible to, under the stresses of daily life. Such high expectations cannot help but be dashed. The "forever kind of love," he will have to learn, is possible. It's just a different kind of love that the wedding-day kind-- not the same, as he thinks.

As a friend of mine puts it-- how many put all their planning into their wedding, which lasts just a day... and none into their marriage, which is supposed to last forever.


Next Song: The Growing Up Years

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The People in the Story

The word "sentimental" is in the opening line, and that's a good word for this whole song.

It starts off obliquely, the way a person with an embarrassing condition might approach a doctor: "If I had... a friend... who has a rash..."

Similarly, this story starts: "There's a sentimental story/ Of two people that I know..."

It's not really a spoiler, even, to reveal the ending: "I'm the boy-- the girl is you."

Still, the speaker approaches her with this sideways shpiel, telling her about this hypothetical couple who "always loved each other so." In fact, "The people in the story/ Lived a storybook romance."

Well, as the Yiddish saying goes-- if it doesn't get better, it gets worse. Either he is working his way up to a proposal, with something like, "Would you like to live happily ever after with me?

Or... um...

"Then they had a lovers' quarrel/ No, I don't recall the reason why.../ And the boy said, 'Goodbye.'"

He was so mad he broke up with her, and now he doesn't even know what he was mad about. Oops.

But wait, if he broke it off, why is he talking to her now? "Now, he's begging for forgiveness/ And a chance to start anew."

It is an interesting approach:. "Imagine, hypothetically, two people in love, and, in theory, the boy stormed off for no real good reason. If he said he was really really really sorry, hypothetically, she'd have to take him back, right?"

He'd better have a better strategy than this. Let's hope he showed up not just with a "sentimental" song but flowers or chocolates or concert tickets (all they have done so far is "go to movies" and out to "dance").

The good news, he is admitting fault, he is coming forward, and he is not blaming any of it on her. Guys like that don't fall out of the sky. She should tell him they can start a new chapter (oh, great. Now I'm doing it).


Next Song: That Forever Kind of Love

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Hiding in the Chapel

The songs starts with a city-wide search for the speaker: "All over town, the question is going 'round/ 'Where, oh where, can he be?'"

The reference to the old song "Where Has My Little Dog Gone?" leads us to understand that they are searching for him out of concern, and that this is not, say, a manhunt for a criminal.

However, he is not hoping for rescue, either. He is, in fact, just looking for a place to be alone to mope. "I'm hiding in the chapel... You ask me why I sit here and cry... Oh, Lord above/ The only girl I love/ Has gone."

Even though he is not a criminal, he is using the chapel as a sanctuary of a similar sort. Mostly, he is hiding from the concerns, blandishments, and cheering-up of others. He is sad, and wants to be sad. And, just as a wounded animal does, he found a safe den in which to lick his wounds, so to speak.

In a way, he is also signaling those who search for him that he is in severe emotional pain. If he were mostly fine, he would seek their solace and allow himself to be comforted.

Also, he is hiding, he says, "from a broken heart." Something about the chapel allows him to feel distracted.

The next line is somewhat melodramatic: "Here I'll stay, until I hear her say/ That she wants me back again." This is passive-aggressive, but also typical behavior for a wounded person. Probably, he will stay until he gets hungry enough to leave.

Up to this point, he has imagined that his lost love has done one of three things-- moved on, mourned the loss of their relationship, or joined the search for him in order to take him back.

Then he realizes, or has somehow heard (unlikely, as who could tell him?), a fourth possibility: "If it's true that she is hiding, too..."

She might be pulling the same stunt he is! In that case, "I'll search for her." Well, he has put himself in a Catch-22. He is willing to seek her out of she is hiding, but cannot know if this is the case since he is hiding!

It would be easy to deduce that the speaker is disturbed. More likely, he is freshly hurt and simply seeking a place to be alone with his thoughts-- and the Lord. His behavior in this sense, is rational in its irrationality. Of course he's not making sense; his world has just been upended!

There is an assumption that someone sad needs to be cheered up. But sometimes, it's important to just be sad, to have the feeling fully, and let it subside on its own. Attempts to suppress it will only cause it to fester and build up pressure until there is an outburst.

Our speaker is in mourning, a legitimate and perfectly healthy reaction to heartbreak. He will get better, and sort his conflicted feelings out. At least he knows that he needs privacy and solitude in order to do so, and has the wisdom to seek out a place where no one will look for him, so he can recover in peace.

NOTE: This next series of songs is not available, as far as I can discern, online. They are on parts 2 and 3 of a series of 3 CDs collectively titled "Paul Simon aka Jerry Landis: Work in Progress." The subtitle most likely refers not only to the songs but to Simon, as they predate his Simon and Garfunkel output, and so present--to borrow a phrase-- a portrait of the songwriter as a young man. It is an excellent series, with very good biographical and discography (discographical?) information.

Next Song: The People in the Story

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Let Me Steal Your Heart Away

Simon, then going as Landis, became the lead singer of the Mystics in 1960. A fairly standard harmony group, their entire catalog seems to consist of 15 tracks, mostly covers. With Simon as a member, they sang their big hit, the Welsh lullaby "All Through the Night," "I Begin to Think of You" and this track.

I hesitate to discuss the track at all, however, as I can only find that the Mystics sang it, not who wrote it. If Simon would want to disown this song, I would not be surprised, as it is simply a series of cliches strung together.

In their entirety, the lyrics are:
"Let me, let me steal your heart away
I'm in love with you, so in love with you
Take me, take me, don't forsake me
Oh, I want your love, yes I need your love

There have been others before you
This, I cannot deny
But now at last I've found you
I know I'll love you till the day I die."

With repetition and instrumental fills, they stretch this to more than two minutes. There is really no need for interpretation or analysis, regardless of who wrote it.

In the interest of completeness, I am posting this song in case Simon did write it. I would not be surprised if he did not. I would also not be surprised if he did... and didn't care for anyone to know.

Next Song: Hiding in the Chapel

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Little Doll Face

[Note: according to some liner notes I saw after this was posted, the song's writer is "unknown."]

There is a Saturday Night Live routine called "Shy Ronny." Andy Samberg plays this character, who is voluble enough to freestyle rap... except when in the presence of Rihanna. Then, he is struck dumb by the power of her beauty, so she thinks he is just dumb.

This scenario, of being made speechless by the presence of an overwhelming radiance, has been part of human experience for a long time. Here, Simon-as-Landis explores the phenomenon from Shy Ronny's standpoint.

The speaker is despondent, as the girl with the "Darling little doll face"-- we know that she has "freckles," and "lashes" that "flutter," but no more of her appearance-- won't even "look at" him. Of course, this is because she doesn't "even know" him.

Of course, he doesn't know her, either. To her, he's a non-entity. To him, she's not much more... just a pretty face that may as well be on a doll.

Some might say this is sexist objectification, and in a way it is. He does see her as an object, a toy at that. But it's simply a reflection of the fact that he does not know her yet as a person... still, he wants to. He does not wish to only see her this way, but for now, her visage is all he has. Well, that and a high opinion of her personality-- "You're lots of sugar, and some spice."

Yes, this nursery-rhyme reference is in keeping with the "doll" metaphor. In fact, it sounds like there is a toy piano on the track.

Mostly, we know that he is not going to get to know her. His objectification of her has made her, in his mind, unapproachable: "Whenever you walk near me/ I'm hypnotized completely... If you'd speak, I'm sure I'd stutter."

He is entirely convinced that he is deserving of her lack-of-notice, and that she is way out of his league. "You're Little Miss Paradise," he tells her, and you can't get more unobtainable than Eden or Heaven. He is sure that she was "born in this world to entice," but be out of reach, like some sort of mythical siren.

"How can I ever tell you/ How much I love you," he moans. He can't, but that is fine because he doesn't love her. He loves her face, and the idea of her, but he doesn't know her well enough to love her.

Until the speaker is able to see her not as a doll, but as a person, she will remain nothing more than an ideal and an idea.

Jim Henson, of Muppet fame, once said, "The only thing between me and my goals is me." This guy needs to start seeing himself as good enough, and her as approachable... and human. Not a doll or angel or statue on a pedestal.

Next Song: Let Me Steal Your Heart Away

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Tell Tale Heart

This song is named, of course, for the famously eerie Edgar Allan Poe story. A murderer would get away with it, as he hides the body beneath his floorboards. But he hears the victim's heart still beating, ever more loudly... and he imagines his impromptu guests do as well. He is tormented by their nonchalance-- surely they must hear it too, and are taunting him with their blase chitchat! How it ends, you likely know; if not, I am not one for spoiling an ending.

Simon, writing here as Landis, uses the image of a heart that gives the game away as the inspiration for a romantic tale.

The speaker begins by explaining that, while he notices his ex-girlfriend with her new beau, with whom she is seen "everywhere," he only "pretend[s]" indifference. "Foolish pride makes me hide/ My tell tale heart." In fairness, simple good manners would probably dictate the same course of (in)action. She knows how he felt for her, but it's over-- what good would his mentioning it do?

He has moved on as well, it seems. But again, all is not as it seems beneath the, um, floorboards. "Other cheeks close to mine/ Make believe I can deceive/ The tell tale heart." This is unfortunate for his new significant other as she is led to believe that she has his full attention and affection, yet does not.

Through all of this deception, he knows his own truth, and he is now starting to believe that his masked emotion is not very well masked at all. His tell tale heart is going to tell tale-- or as we say now, "tattle tale"-- on him.

Here, the music, which was smooth and Latinate and accompanied by a hushed vocal, shifts dramatically into surf rock. "Many a romance may break up," our speaker realizes, "Many a teardrop will fall/ But the beat-beat-beat of a tell tale heart?/ That is the worst fate of all."

The "beat-beat-beat" in the case of the Poe story, and in the case of this tale, serve a similar purpose-- to reveal a secret that the speaker feels may be no secret at all. "Everyone can see through my outward calm and innocent mien; they all know my guilt," each feels.

At least our speaker has the nerve to admit to himself that, "Deep inside, I still know/ That I love, love you so." His conclusion? "It's clear I need you near/ This tell tale heart."

Be that as it may, he does not have very many practical options for resolving his situation. He would have to overcome several obstacles-- ending his new relationship, getting his ex to end hers, and then making it work now with someone it did not work with before.

Yes, he must move on. But first he must get over her, or risk having his love for her poison every relationship he has going forward. And first of all, he must admit to himself that he is not over her, a realization his relentlessly throbbing heart has driven home.

This is a remarkably sophisticated song, even beyond its literary reference. In a very short space, Simon has sketched out a classic tale of love, longing, and regret. It is full of pain and sadness, and even fear... of being discovered, and having his personal anguish leak out and hurt others.

This is a very emotionally mature and self-aware work, especially from one so young.

Next Song: Little Doll Face

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